Why marketing feels uncomfortable—and how to make it safer 

Welcome to Female Owned, the podcast for small business without the hustle, without the hacks, without the overwhelm. My name is Astrid Bracke and I’m a small business mentor working with small business owners, freelancers and creatives just like you to create slower, gentler and more profitable businesses.

Feeling overwhelmed by marketing is just one of the things I experienced myself—which I talked about in previous episodes. But even if you have a marketing strategy that is as spacious and gentle as you need it to be, marketing can still feel like a hurdle you can’t overcome.

In this episode, I’ll explore two common discomforts that shape how we market our businesses. The first is visibility. Being seen can feel risky, especially if you have been taught that taking up space is unsafe or improper. 

The second is asking for money. Many small business owners feel resistance around pricing and selling, even when they care deeply about their work. Together, these discomforts can make marketing feel overwhelming. This episode will help you find safer and more confident ways to navigate both.

Marketing effectively doesn’t only require us to have a plan or strategy, it requires us to be visible. 

Every time we send an email, we’re visible. When we launch our website, we’re visible. When we’re sharing a post on social media, we’re visible.

And that can make you feel really uncomfortable, even unsafe. And that’s normal. Especially if you were raised and socialised female, you may have explicitly or implicitly learned that being visible as a woman isn’t safe. That taking up space as a woman isn’t safe, or proper. 

And the same might go for you depending on your race, gender or sexual identity. You may have been taught by the world that you shouldn’t be visible, that you shouldn’t take up space.

If that’s you, then marketing can make you feel incredibly unsafe. But if you have a marketing ecosystem and strategy that is intentional and that suits your strengths and values, you’re creating safety for yourself. You can experiment with rooting into confidence and trust when it comes to your own marketing. Including slowly starting to feel safe.

Feeling safe matters. You do not have to make yourself uncomfortably visible to do effective marketing. You can decide exactly what you will and will not share. You can choose forms of visibility that feel more protected, like your newsletter or your website, before experimenting with more exposed formats—if at all. You can collect kind words about your work to make you feel more comfortable. You can go gently.

Of course being visible doesn’t mean bearing all—and it certainly doesn’t mean creating and sharing content that you’re not comfortable with at all. 

What I’m always looking for with my clients—and myself—is a small stretch of their comfort zone. To experiment with being slightly more visible, whether that’s sharing a little bit more about themselves on their website, sending more newsletters, or recording a short video of themselves and their work. 

For you, that small stretch might be different, and there will probably always be things you’ll never do, although you might surprise yourself.

When I reshaped my marketing a few years ago, I deliberately began to focus only on channels where I feel comfortable. Channels where I don’t feel vulnerable or too visible. 

I love writing—and it allows me to hide a little bit behind the words too. 

A few years ago I never thought I’d be doing a podcast, but being on other people’s podcasts and having an attitude of experimentation slowly made me more comfortable. I’m even fine creating videos now for my newsletter and workshops—even though creating videos for something like Instagram or TikTok feels off for many reasons for me.

Visibility is one hurdle. The other major one that often surfaces in conversations with my clients is money.

Just as you might have been told not to take up space, you might have learned that you shouldn’t ask for money. Or for anything really. 

Asking for money is one of the most difficult things we do as small business owners. And it’s something that keeps many of my clients from marketing at all, or from truly sharing their services and products.

Of course, we’re not really asking for money—we’re suggesting a transaction. A transaction that someone is completely free to enter into. 

There are a few things you can do to make the money-part easier. You can clarify your pricing on your website so you don’t need to state it repeatedly in conversation. You can write out scripts, templates or just a phrase to come back to in which you share your prices. 

With our marketing, we’re not forcing someone to buy. We’re merely sharing. Inviting. Connecting.

Indeed, that is the most powerful reframe about marketing that I can offer you. Marketing is not about forcing something on someone. Marketing, especially the kind done intentionally, by thoughtful business owners like you, is a way of connecting. If something is valuable to you, it will be valuable to someone else—whether it’s that beautiful mug you’ve created, or the mentoring support you offer.

My invitation today to you is to examine your marketing discomfort. What stories are lurking underneath it? And which gentle steps and reframes can you experiment with to slowly feel more comfortable? What is one small step you can take this week to be more visible?

And I can promise you that marketing, taking up space and making that connection will become easier. 

It can still feel uncomfortable, and especially during a launch I feel it too—but with small steps you can gently expand your comfort zone. 

At the end of the day, if we want to run our own business and make money doing so, we’re going to have to market. If we don’t share about what we have to offer, people aren’t magically going to find out. But I’m also feeling more comfortable about marketing because I do so in a way that is aligned with my values and vision.

And that is what my gentle marketing programme Grow is all about too: gentle, effective and sustainable marketing that is all you. If you’re listening to this as this episode goes live, today is the last day to join Grow this cohort. And if you’re too late to join this round, sign up for the waitlist to find out when the programme returns. 

All the links, including to the free marketing hurdles quiz and working with me 1:1, are in the show notes. 

Speak to you soon!